Their Daddy's Mouth


Alright.

I'm doing it.

I'm blogging about being pregnant.

Well actually,
I'm going to talk about 
Tyler and my pregnancy.

While each child and pregnancy is special,
there has to be something extra lovely
about a man & woman
going through this process together 
for the first time...

...because as much as I want to remember the feeling of my babies kicking,
the way I felt when I first found out I was pregnant
or the way they bounce around on the sonogram screen,
there is no way in heck I want to forget these gems
that have come out of my husband's mouth.


What I saw when I walked out to the car after we found out we were having twins.




When I showed him my pregnancy test,
I said "Look! Two lines!"

To which he replied...
"Woah. What does that mean??"

To which I laughed:
"Just that I'm pregnant... 
not that there are two babies."

{That joke was on me.}

_________________


While waiting at the Doctor's office:

Lauren: Hey babe, look.
Remind me to tell our midwife that we want a home birth.

{Sarcastically points to flyer on wall about elective home births.}

Tyler: What? We can't do a home birth...

Lauren: Well, duh. I know...
but why do you say that?

Tyler: Because our bath tub isn't big enough 
for both of us and the nurse to fit in it at the same time.

Lauren: What?
 Oh babe, no.
No, that's not what happens.
It's not always in the bath tub.

Tyler: Huh? Where is it?

Lauren: It's like, on the bed, babe.

Tyler: You do what?

{Gags.}

Do they make trashbags that big?

_______________


You know babe, 
now that your stomach is so big
it makes your butt look smaller.

________________


While looking through racks of baby clothes,
I held up two outfits 
and suggested them for their coming home outfits.

Tyler looked at me like I was an alien
and asked why we needed to buy outfits 
to bring them home from the hospital.

I replied that we would have to bring them home in something.

To which he just rolled his eyes and said: 

Why can't we just wrap them up in blankets over their diapers?

______________


So there we have it.

Straight from the mouth of man 
who has given me two offspring...

and I can only hope they are just like him.


46 comments:

  1. The things some people say....just you wait for many more things out of the mouths of your babe.
    pve

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  2. haha! what an awesome post! I can totally see my husband saying each and every one of those things. :)

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  3. Two lines does equal two babies! ;)

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  4. Oh my... That picture is PRICELESS!! Seriously frame-worthy.

    I think my husband shares the same sentiment about home births and trash bags.

    I loved the butt comment. That seems like something my husband would say. Only in my case, it would be true. You don't have a big butt. :)

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  5. That is so funny! I hope you keep writing these gems down!!

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  6. That picture really is frame-worthy. This was too funny! You two are adorable...

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  7. Great photo! Please keep sharing. He's hilarious!

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  8. Bahaha..that was awesome!!! I can't wait to hear what he says once they are here!!! Kind of, but not really, off subject...you look amazing! I'm sure you don't feel it (because you never do when you are pregnant), but you are tiny!! Hot mama ;)

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  9. hahahahahahaha I'm crying and dying over here. Thank you so much for sharing this!

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  10. What gems! I can only imagine what it is going to be like when we have babies -- I can already tell my husband is going to say some extra-special things :)

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  11. awww I really cannot wait for you guys to become parents! you're both so adorable, I can only imagine how your babies will turn out. :)

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  12. The twins are going to LOVE this when they get older. Congrats, btw!

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  13. As funny as those statements are, nothing tops that picture. It needs to go in the "fatherhood museum". If there ever was such a thing! ;)

    http://likeordinarylife.com

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  14. Thanks for sharing! I read this post aloud to my husband and he agrees with Tyler regarding the coming home outfits. My husband would prefer we wrap our baby in blankets all the time sans clothing and leave it at that! :)

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  15. I'm in tears! I need to email you some of the things Mike has said but nothing will compare to that picture. :-)

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  16. It's all pure gold, but that picture? That needs to be framed in the nursery... It's too perfect!

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  17. Can't get over that picture---and this post is absolutely hilarious...no doubt there is more to come! :)

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  18. I'm laughing out loud at that last one, men have no idea sometimes!

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  19. Bah Ha!
    Sounds strangely like my Husband! :)
    So glad that you're sharing this process with us, I'm lovin it!

    I'm sure your girlies will love to look back at these comments too.
    "Really, Dad??"

    Love,
    Manda from Eat Cake

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  20. How adorable. I love seeing men in the father/caring position. It's just so sweet.

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  21. You made me smile!
    This is wonderful and so sweet!

    Love,
    Svenjaxx

    Happybluebird

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  22. Hehehe - men. The photo is priceless!

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  23. This post with that photo is pretty epic.

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  24. What a sweetheart! I love that you captured him taking in the fact that you're having twins...that is priceless!

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  25. hahahahaha, I love how clueless boys are. And the photo is amazing, so glad you captured that!

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  26. Ha just amazing! Love the picture.

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  27. That photo is amazing. I want to hear more of what this guy has to say! Hilarious!

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  28. Hilarious! Blog about pregnancy and those little girls as much as you'd like! And if they ever need an older man for protection, Noah and I will be on the next flight over.

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  29. This is hilarious and I love seeing wives who just adore their husbands.

    Also - is there REALLY a man out there who prefers home births? I can't imagine a single man seriously 100% excited about that.

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  30. The photo is priceless. And I think the questions will only get better. Wait till he has to figure out how to make ponytails on two girls!

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  31. Too funny! The coming home outfits is definitely something I can picture Russ saying in the future - they just don't think about these things the same way we do!

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  32. I laughed all the way through these! So precious! And I love that photo... Cannot wait to hear all about the two lovely little ladies once they arrive! :)

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  33. "Why can't we just wrap them up in blankets over their diapers?"...I spit out my food reading this.
    When Andrew and I saw TWO babies on the sonogram, the first thing he said to me was "well this is really going to change everything."...I know...so romantic isn't he? He later redeemed himself by saying "it's better to have two than none." so true. Wouldn't change it for a thing...twins are really as cool as they sound (ok...once they are sleeping all night that is true)

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  34. oh, husbands! they're so cute, aren't they?!

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  35. Ha ha! So cute and very sincere... definitely worth remembering!
    xo

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  36. so funny--my husband made some similar classic comments too when i was pregnant...men ;)

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  37. Aaaaaactually, my cousin's kids were born in the tub at home! :)

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  38. Too funny! And I just love that pic!

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  39. My husband agreed with Tyler's comment about wrapping the babies in blankets: "he's just looking to save money...smart".

    Men

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  40. That photo is amazing. I'm pretty sure my husband would say similar things. Especially about the coming home outfits. Oh men.

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  41. That photo is hilarious... and he is so quotable. Wow!

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  42. HAHAHA I love the humor that you're both finding in all of this! His responses are very similar to what I expect M would say...

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